I've been trying to figure out what to say. Tapping fingers and silent lists and all of it seems wrong. I've been waiting on words that might fit, that could perhaps tie up the pieces of who I am to present in a neatly designed package. But it's not quite that simple. And I realized that it doesn't have to be.

This is supposed to showcase the best of me. My work, my words... Here, I display the countless hours of zooming and drawing and fixing and imagining. All of it drawn from seeing what's around me and not accepting it at face value. What we've got, the deal that I've been handed... Well, there has to be more. I've known that since I was a little kid. Without even seeing what was out there, I grasped onto this crazy idea that what I am given is not what I must accept, and it's that mindset that fuels just about every thing I do. I knew my dreams were larger than the place I grew up in and more exciting than the small town that Lee University resides in, but it's within these places that I've been molded and crafted and that I've realized just how much I want to do this thing called being a creative. 

But I would be lying if I said that that didn't scare me.

There's this feeling that I've never been able to escape. Somehow, I always end up feeling small. Whether it's my own thoughts or actions or maybe other people, sometimes it just seems like I'm not big enough to do this thing. That all those crazy ideas I had about escaping and doing more is too much and I'm simply not going to get it. And that my work is just too small. And yet, I refuse to accept even that . So what does that self-doubt--that fear--tell me? 

That it's time to work harder.

What's the point of only showing the best of yourself? The hopes, the dreams, and the fears are what makes us human. And as much as I wish I could gloss over the bad parts and forget about all the things that make me scared, that's not going to make me a better designer, writer, or photographer. In fact, I think it might make me worse. 

I'll be the first to admit that I'm not perfect. But perfection isn't exactly the main goal here. I'd much rather focus on taking something and making it better, finding ways to be innovative and change hearts and actions. But most of all my main goal is to be in a place I love, with people I love who share the same values and heart about working hard with our hands as I do. 

So here we are. Here I give you my motivations, my designs, my inspirations, my writing, my setbacks, my photography, my endless rants and that which I hope only pushes me further. Perhaps it won't always be neatly tied up and ready to print, but it's all a part of the process of who I am and who I am trying to be.

I hope you discover it joyfully.